Jokes in the Bathroom (early June 2021)

  • Patreon! -
    Social media - @lukastarnold everywhere
    My podcast! Two Nosy Meerkats
    Social: @twonosymeerkats everywhere
    And everywhere you consume podcasts :)
    Website -
    Merch -
    Standup Dates -
    Twitter - LukasTArnold
    Facebook - lukastarnold/
    Instagram - lukastarnold

Comments • 705

  • Toyosochii o3o
    Toyosochii o3o 13 hours ago

    1- sneezing is fun and games until your religious friend says “god bless you” to an atheist
    2- Uno reverse, I envy your non existential thoughts. It throws me into an anxiety spiral

  • Osboss Art
    Osboss Art 14 hours ago

    Adopt a highway 🤣

  • TheMsJessM
    TheMsJessM 16 hours ago

    Have you had Amish food? They have flavour. I’ll grant you it’s butter but no one gets mad at carbs!

  • Pat Pont
    Pat Pont Day ago

    I've never had thai food and I'm just a regular dude, idek where some Thai food is here in wv

  • Amon Ninja
    Amon Ninja Day ago

    Yeah why do we HAVE to adopt one instead of just going to a breeder, I want a newly breed highway thank you very much(this is a joke dont take it seriusly karen)

  • Catpuchino Lovecatcoffee

    700 comments lol

  • S1m9ly Bxb4 M1lk

    Yknow when you have to sneeze and it wont come out for about a minute, then you sneeze and its amazing??

  • Aether's emergency food

    Nah, sneezing sucks. I have this special allergy or something (it's not officially diagnosed by a doctor, just from experience) that when I do so much as inhale dust, I'll be sneezing my brains out for the next thirty minutes. Even just a light bump to my nose will trigger a sneezing marathon out of me. Could literally finish a whole tissue roll in one sitting if it's a cold day, and if the electric fan/ac is right in front of me, it'll be even worse. I'm even allergic to a specific type of chocolate cake, which sucks because chocolate is literally my FAVORITE. So yeah, sneezing does not slap for me over here lol

  • yesenia Dimas
    yesenia Dimas Day ago

    “Sneezing kinda slaps” not when it’s 3-5 times in a row 🥲

  • Fatinhannani Suhaimi

    Thai food = overload sense of flavour = health issues due to high amount of every single seasoning you could ever thing of

  • 쀵쀵귀염이
    쀵쀵귀염이 2 days ago +1

    the angry goodbye in the first one, I feel you 🤣💀

  • Wild Twisted
    Wild Twisted 2 days ago

    Sneazing is freshfull.... its like restart my self

  • Quiet Zest
    Quiet Zest 2 days ago

    As someone who sneezes like.. idk once a day at least, sneezing is the worst

  • gay bear
    gay bear 2 days ago

    Your breaking my brain

  • clara hasbrook
    clara hasbrook 2 days ago

    If I was Amish, and had to give up good food or go back to my family, I’d pick food food lol.

  • Fuhakku
    Fuhakku 2 days ago

    YES someone understands sneezing, I like sneezing but I have NO allergies, I sneeze like once every two months.

  • Xero Kai
    Xero Kai 3 days ago

    If some hit kirby would it cond as child abuse or animal abuse

  • Dinoking 276
    Dinoking 276 3 days ago

    Bro sneezing do slap but watch out your sneeze goes a hundred miles in that singular second which could crack one of your ribs

  • Chovoli Ember
    Chovoli Ember 3 days ago

    You remind me so much of John Mulaney and I can't get over it. My now daily fix of humor + John Mulaney vibes? 👌 perfect

  • Jena Estay
    Jena Estay 3 days ago

    OK so everyone knows the shower thought you get just imagine having one of those at 1 AM

  • Iambestunicorn
    Iambestunicorn 3 days ago

    Sneezing is my favorite body thing 😂

  • The Colonel
    The Colonel 3 days ago

    Actually rumspringa isn’t a real thing for most Amish, I’m friends with many and people bring this up all the time

  • Da Panda
    Da Panda 4 days ago

    When I’m trying to sleep i come up with theories of if I might actually be god

    • Da Panda
      Da Panda 4 days ago

      I mean I don’t even have proof that other people can think

  • cassiopeia malfoy
    cassiopeia malfoy 4 days ago

    Sneezing slaps unless your female

  • finley burns
    finley burns 4 days ago

    sneeezing slaps until it’s the fourth time in a row

  • Pigtaku
    Pigtaku 4 days ago

    Ehhh weird one speaking as a right winger. Harmless though just most of us in my right-wing group all adopt animals, hell i just resuced a kitten from a mcdonalds parking lot, 6 weeks old with a dead paw. He had to get a amputation and is currently still recovering.

    But damn dude your voice is like melted chocolate on my ears.

  • tim no
    tim no 4 days ago

    Dude i agree sneezing dose slap... Just that buildup and then a big release... Oh man..... Reminds me of somthing else... Just cant put my mind on it

  • Luna Moon
    Luna Moon 5 days ago

    Okay but like the amish are hands down the best bakers

  • Ashen One
    Ashen One 6 days ago

    I mean depends on the allergy. For example my hayfever can get so bad my face bleeds. Nose skin and the mouth and throat whole thing it sucks.

  • Draconic Duelist
    Draconic Duelist 7 days ago

    Sneezing hurts, man. Even when I'm bit sick, it hurts my throat and feels like I'm going to dislocate my shoulder when sneezing into my elbow...

  • anoniempie lol
    anoniempie lol 7 days ago

    You need a certain level of broken humor to Get most of his jokes... I have not reached it yet

  • Sara Nascimento
    Sara Nascimento 7 days ago

    I wonder if they can do drugs

  • - channie’s ducky -

    the sneeze part had me pause to actually appreciate that fact, agree, actually nod, and then like the video and continue it.

  • AmberRaeIanetti84
    AmberRaeIanetti84 7 days ago

    Amish people who leave the community are still Amish. My very flamboyant vocal music professor was 100% ethnically Amish. He and his mother left the community but still spoke the language(a form of old German with a unique accent) . This happens a lot. Tons of these people in and near Philly and they live regular American lives eating all sorts of foods.

  • Today is My Sad Day
    Today is My Sad Day 7 days ago

    My in bed thoughts: Whats it feel like to got to sleep wonder what wold happen if i jumped of the top of my stairs what about slitting my throat. And the happen at they same time

  • Hope Wiley
    Hope Wiley 7 days ago

    All I know is my auntie used to by corned beef from the Amish market and it was to die for like omg. But it shut down and now it's just a memory 😭

  • 𝐾𝑎𝑦𝑙𝑖𝑛 ♥︎♫

    I literally woke up this morning with a sore throat, been sneezing all day and just got a runny nose. It’s a sign. Also, seasonal allergies are much better than anaphylactic reactions, be grateful lol :) unless of course you have an allergy causing an anaphylactic reaction, in which case we can suffer together

  • International Secret Spy

    I learned that sneezing kinda slapped when I was like 5 and would tickle the inside of my nose and make myself sneeze
    Now my hair isn't long enough to do that when I want to sneeze away a stuffy nose, but the pointy twisted toilet paper corner isn't

  • Jenna Raymond
    Jenna Raymond 7 days ago

    The goodbye leading into hey always gets me 😂

  • EpicSpaceDorito
    EpicSpaceDorito 7 days ago

    I would let this guy raw me tbh

  • Ash Evans
    Ash Evans 7 days ago

    I once went to bed thinking "what if I'm colour blind" And the first thing I thought about as I woke up is "how do deaf people know they are deaf? "

  • Noah Gadea
    Noah Gadea 8 days ago

    Is this guy trying to parody comedians?? or... does he think he's a comedian?? 🤨

  • Mika Mizuki
    Mika Mizuki 8 days ago

    As a Thai I fucking love you so much for actually know more than pad-thai and Tom yum-kung.

  • Ariel anonymous
    Ariel anonymous 8 days ago

    Real mark normand joe list vibe.

  • MouseMaster
    MouseMaster 8 days ago

    I have year round alergies ;-; emagine waking up every moring with a stuff nose and if you lie on one side to long your nose will get plugged untill you turn the other way, yeah ive been dealing with that every day for the past like maybe 3 years :/
    So im editing this now i rememberd it might just take like 30 seconds to get plugged nose on one side and i seenze alot and when i do its usually in like bursts of like 2 or 3 in a row maybe rarely 4

  • bcvbb hyui
    bcvbb hyui 8 days ago

    Frankly I enjoy sneezing. It just feels good to have that relief afterwards.

  • Samantha Berry
    Samantha Berry 8 days ago

    Why does his voce make me think of Technoblade?? 😂😂

  • ✿Ep
    ✿Ep 9 days ago

    Sneezing is cool in all till your puking then pick comes out of your nose happened to me

  • Super Cute Kitty Gamer

    I have a seasonal allergy.
    The worst kind during the 'Rona.
    I have a seasonal *cough.*

  • Miss Terror
    Miss Terror 9 days ago +1

    Sneezing slaps until you find out its extremely dangerous and the power of your sbeeze can damage a part of your body (I forgot some details)

    • bcvbb hyui
      bcvbb hyui 8 days ago +1

      i have existential thoughts alm the time and if not that im doubting everything ppl do id much rather think abt is the amish have had thai before

  • Percival
    Percival 9 days ago

    Anyone other than me kinda hear Jerry Seinfeld in his voice?

  • beeto
    beeto 9 days ago

    this guys videos are so annoying. they're barely witty and not even a little bit fun. what's the point?

  • YTG
    YTG 9 days ago

    Yes sneezing slaps

  • EggaBaconPlays
    EggaBaconPlays 9 days ago

    I cannot get over this guy's voice, it sound weird (no offense) but I also love it XD

  • zz girl
    zz girl 9 days ago

    I adopted a highway his name is hoza

  • Michelle
    Michelle 10 days ago

    I want that type of thoughts, switch with my existential dread please

  • Fursicle
    Fursicle 10 days ago

    the amish around me go to authentic mexican restaurants weekly and order the spiciest stuff they got on the menu, and order it extra spicy too. Like literally they can down 15 Carolina Reapers and be like "more"

  • George K
    George K 10 days ago

    I thought your comedy was a bit naff when it first appeared on my shorts but now it's pretty good. Keep it up man.

  • Nøt Alex
    Nøt Alex 10 days ago

    He sounded like jfk I. The first one

  • eioshen boboi
    eioshen boboi 10 days ago

    there lol.

  • Dominic Toretto
    Dominic Toretto 10 days ago

    I envy ppl that dream when they sleep...for me its just lights off and on.

  • GuiltyVan
    GuiltyVan 11 days ago

    I’m Thai and somehow I feel proud when my Country got mention!

  • -K Ø U R Ø_R 3 N-
    -K Ø U R Ø_R 3 N- 11 days ago

    Why does he sound like techno?(a lil bit bc of the voice)

  • uncontrollable sobbing

    i have existential thoughts alm the time and if not that im doubting everything ppl do id much rather think abt is the amish have had thai before

    • eioshen boboi
      eioshen boboi 10 days ago

      sneezes back to back. And my reward for those 40 sneezes? Nothing my nose still itches and wants to sneeze.

  • Juan Cena
    Juan Cena 11 days ago

    One midnight thought is if sayu from higehiro has an STD? Probably right?

  • Femke
    Femke 11 days ago

    I mean I have seasonal allergy and if I forget to take my meds, I keep feeling like I have to sneeze, but then not sneezing. And my eyes get all watery and stuff.
    Luckily I also have allergies that just last the entire year so forgetting my medication is rare hahaha

  • big chunky Wallace
    big chunky Wallace 11 days ago

    I was siting in my room and I refused my pants was not tied so I tied the and wile I was doing that my mom walked in and thought I was 🤜my🥩

  • thunderie gacha
    thunderie gacha 11 days ago

    G O O D B Y E ✨

  • misolou fout
    misolou fout 11 days ago

    Plot Twist: He is the Amish, on the Rumspringa.

  • MoonSh0ttAlch3mist
    MoonSh0ttAlch3mist 11 days ago

    Sneezing slap util your chest hurts